This blog is organized in reverse order...from the oldest post to the newest.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009


I left the lab last night at about 8 PM. I received a call this morning a few minutes ago describing how the Loki Variation has been released through some sort of accident at the testing lab. I was told that human beings have been infected, outside of the lab. I was told to report to a different meeting location for everyone involved in the project, probably to come up with ways to contain the infection before it reaches a greater population.

I have tried to leave the project. I have tried to transfer out to a different internship somewhere, but strangely, no other labs were accepting new interns. I tried to request a leave of absence, but was denied. My next step was to just leave and try to work it out with the Master's program later but I had not taken that step yet, and I fear I may have waited too long.

I am going to the meeting. I don't know what to expect, but I do know that several local authorities on infectious diseases and health departments have been notified, and there may already be a quarantine in effect. I am not sure how widespread this has already become.

What I do know is that this is a very dangerous parasite. It creates a very dangerous creature, stronger and faster than we ever thought, and resilient. The parasite reproduces at an alarmingly fast rate, and is easily transmitted. And it makes the infected extremely volatile, violent, and dangerous.

In Norse mythology, Loki was originally used by the Gods to do their bidding. He ended up becoming more and more mischievous, until mischief turned into evil. He eventually ended up being responsible for the death of the God of Light, and was prophesied to be the one to lead the battle against the Gods.

I'm scared that I couldn't have picked a more appropriate name for the Loki Variation.

Friday, July 17, 2009


I am completely at a loss. After my last post, I went back to my lab, and continued assisting in the creation, maintenance, and observation of the Loki Variation. I tried to ignore what I had seen at the other facility, telling myself that it was for the greater good.

However, I think I have learned something I can't ignore. I think they are now testing on humans.

I received a copy of a report on the results of the latest attempt to control the rapid reproduction of the Loki Variation using common anti-parasite drugs. Basically the results of the testing are satisfactory to the ones with the money; I think I have that figured out as well, but I will come back to that.

However, they want to be able to cure it just as rapidly as it can be administered. None of the drugs are working, and the report included negative effects on organs and specific parts of the body, except these body parts and organs are different than what would be in a chimpanzee. I'm not a zoologist, so I am studying, but I am fairly certain they are now using the Loki Variation on human subjects. This goes beyond any ethical problem I imagined I would be facing.

As far as figuring out what the actual goal of the company is, I am trying to stay off the conspiracy theory bandwagon, but it's becoming clearer every day that this parasitic infection was never meant for medicine, but more for use as a military tactic.

Pump the soldiers with a parasite that gives them an adrenaline rush, send them to fight, and then give them the antidote when they are done. How is that for some action movie plot insanity? I think I am working for a company that wants to create super soldiers. I can't even wrap my head around it, but I do know that the government and military have tried things like this in the past, using LSD and other drugs, and we all know about Agent Orange and the governments ever-growing desire to come up with something a step ahead of anyone else.

So there it is. I don't have any proof of any of this, but I am pretty sure that even if I am not completely correct, I am not far off the mark. I can't keep working on this project, but I am just not sure how to get out of it without ruining my Master's program.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Delicate Balance.

I don't even know where to begin, or if I even should.

After 4 weeks of observing the Loki Variation outside of a host, I was invited to spend time at the lab of the other team, where the actual testing of the variations was taking place. I had braced myself for the hard part of testing, the use of animals. I wasn't ready for what I found.

I am trying to justify it in my mind, and I am not sure I can. This is my career choice, I fully stand behind what I am doing, and there are things that I will have to accept in order to continue. I just don't know if this is one of them.

But they are testing on chimpanzees. Not rats. Primates. I have never felt more like one of the extremist animal activists as I did when I saw them, all lined up in rows in a fluorescent-lit,stainless steel lab, some of them drugged or sedated, others...well, not.

I bit my tongue, though, and was able to actually be a part of the testing and observation for a while.

The Loki Variation is producing the same symptoms as what is normally called an adrenaline rush. The adrenal gland is stimulated, and releases the endorphins necessary to bring about what is known as the "fight or flight" response. This is what you experience when you have a moment of panic, and your body does things that prepare you for what you might have to do next to survive. It's the most basic of instincts that most living creatures experience.

Let's say you are walking down the street minding your own business, and suddenly you come face to face with a lion. Your adrenal gland is stimulated by the sight of the lion, and it goes into action. It releases chemicals that tell your body to do things, like make your heart beat faster to pump blood faster so that you are already ready to go if you need to run. It pushes a chemical into your muscles that make them stronger than normal, temporarily, in case you need to fight the lion. It dilates your eyes a bit so you can see more, especially in dark scenarios, and it sometimes even makes your body dispel extra weight to move faster, which is why some people urinate or defecate on themselves in times of terror. Your body is preparing for either fighting the lion or running away from it, and this all takes place in a matter of a few seconds, all controlled by a tiny gland.

The Loki Variation is not the first external cause of manipulating the adrenal gland. Several recreational drugs can do this, as well as putting yourself in a situation where your body's natural reaction is fight or flight, like skydiving or something. Ever heard of the term adrenaline junkie? That's why.

But, what the Loki Variation can do is turn that gland on, and have it produce the adrenaline rush for an extended period of time. That is where we are right now in testing. These chimpanzees exhibit the symptoms of an adrenaline rush, from the rapid heartbeat to the involuntary shaking of the pumped muscles, the dilated eyes to the higher pain tolerance and strength. Can you imagine being locked in an adrenaline rush for hours, days, weeks?

That's not even the most horrifying part.

Another apparent symptom of the manipulation of the adrenal gland is some kind of neurosis or psychosis, where they become violent and uncontrollable. It's like watching a horror movie. As soon as a tech enters the room, the entire place goes nuts; screaming, banging, some of them hurting themselves trying to get at the techs.

And so far, they don't know how to get rid of the Loki Variation, there is no off switch. Except death.

I don't know how long this blog will stay up. I am putting my job at an incredible risk to post this information, but it's a very delicate balance for me between marching forward with research that could help society, or reporting something I find indescribably cruel and pointless. I don't know which one this is yet.

I will post more as soon as I can.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Hello everyone! I apologize for the length of time that has gone by since the last entry. To compensate, I will give you the best news so far:

We have a success!

Well, more of a success than a failure. After the first 8 variations were tested, 5 of them were scrapped, and 3 of them were sent back to the drawing board for a bit more modification. There were also 2 more variations that were created as well. They are the B0L75 and the G12M0 variations, lovingly called the "Bolts" and "Gizmo" variations by me. Ah, the strange things being a lonely lab tech will make you do...

This cycle has happened more than a few times at this point. Several modifications and modifications on modifications have been created, tested, and failed. I have gone through 76 variations total. None of them have been successful.

Anyway, initial results on all of the modified variations as well as the new variations didn't look very promising. Apparently the parasite became unstable and weak as a result of the modifications, and although I could keep them alive in a dormant state, as soon as they were administered to the subjects, certain functions failed. Mostly it was reproduction. The little guys just can't do it on their own.

We had heard rumors of possibly splicing a piece of genetic material from a type of virus, as viruses are masters at reproducing. They basically make the cells of whatever it is that they infected get really confused and start making copies of the virus itself.

The idea was to give the protozoan parasite variations the ability to reproduce like a virus. As far as I know, splicing a parasite and a virus together has never been attempted, let alone been successful. Trying to keep the same traits that we are looking for in the parasite (which I am not even sure of at this point) as well as making it able to reproduce on it's own in a relatively short time is the ultimate goal.

Two new "viral parasite" variations were presented a few weeks ago. They were labeled "L0K1" and "L0N6," following the same pattern as before where the part of the genetic code that was altered is named, and you can see the "L0" that is apparent in each label is representative of a gene responsible for reproduction. To me, the two new variations are called the Loki Variation and the Long Variation.

The success came today, we were told that rapid reproduction has been observed in the test subjects. Evidently, the Loki Variation has provided most of the wanted results in the subjects, and can also reproduce on it's own, very rapidly. Again, I can't tell you much about the desired effects, or the actual results of the testing, either because of NDAs I signed, or because I just don't know, but it's an exciting time right now at the lab.

Since the Loki Variation is the one that has come closest to producing the criteria wanted by the company that hired our lab, it looks like the more in depth part of my internship will begin. The Loki Variation will be reproduced outside a host, and it will be up to me to keep them alive, and to observe their patterns when they are not inside a host. I also will be able to compare my observations with the observations of the test team, so I will finally be able to see what the results of the parasite on living creatures will be. I'm nervous and excited.

I feel that I could go into a rambling fit at any moment, so I will end here. But rest assured that I will post more as soon as I have news.